at sixteen i told myself by my mid-twenties i wanted to have a career and be married with two children. now, at twenty five, i'm just praying my card isn't declined at target.

Forget All Your Troubles, Forget All Your Cares

Another Friday train to meet friends, except this time I'm traveling a different route. 

Downtown. 

I moved to Harlem. I spent to summers in high school living in dancing in Harlem. I've been having those reflective/end of movie walking down the street smiling moments lately. However, some things still are the same. 

I'm still broke. 

I dropped $100 I don't even have in a hardware store, those monthly reminders that I'm an adult are here, yet here I am heading downtown.

The lights are much brighter and I can forget all my cares. 

I've been thinking about 16 year old Nurney in Harlem. I wonder if 16 year old Nurney knew he would end up around the corner. I mean it, I'm 3 blocks away from where I used to live. I wonder if 16 year old Nurney knew he'd end up drunk and soaked on a Subway car at midnight. I'm in my twenties. I'll bounce back.

Tomorrow morning I'll be at work with a coffee complaining but I'll survive.

I don't want to live a life where I don't stay out too late.

I don't want to live a life where last call is the end of the night.

I don't want a life where old friends can't be new drinking buddies.

I don't want to live a life where it can quite literally rain on my parade. 

I'm driving this car till the wheels fall off and the engine cries mercy.

I am in control.

Grateful AF

Adulting